
Whenever I feel bad, I hug myself, and my guns comfort me.

– Is this thought bubble really neccessary?

– I got caught again at work today making funny faces at myself in the bathroom mirror

– Not new: Sleeping on the subway New: Drool

– It may be our day of holocaust but we find peace and justice in knowing just how fattening we are.

– When you look through your screen at me like that, I tell you everything
The honeymoon period is over.

– I could only fit the first hundred in my wallet. I carry the other four hundred in my underwear.

– I am going to get inside you! Museli